A Brain Dump...

Holy "Lost track of time" Batman!!! I can't believe this many months have blown by, and not a single word has dripped onto my blog. I'm sitting in my living room after a long day of getting over a week's worth of what appeared to be bronchitis, my son's baseball game, work, a couple of double cheeseburgers from Mickey D's for dinner, and a very loud movie night of Star Wars with my family.

Anymore the days seem to blow by like minutes on the clock. These late nights are usually when I reflect on life...good and bad, and how easy come easy go life can be. Oh yeah, here's a little nugget that you all probably didn't know...I always have to listen to music while I write, and tonight's selection is "Unforgotten." Some of you will recognize it...others will not.

Unforgotten.mp3

I'm sorta in the mood for a massive brain dump...so here goes:

While I look back over the last few months, I just realized my Ethan is already 9 years old, and my Ryan is going to be 6 in July. I've been with HP for 8 years now and I've seen how wonderful and evil corporate America can be. I've watched many friends come and go over the years for whatever reason. I've lost my grandfather and grandmother in roughly a year's time. My cousin (early 20's) suddenly passed away and I watched my Aunt cry more than I ever could imagine. I've watched gas prices infuriate the masses. I watch my OCD levels fluctuate and learn from it...some things just don't matter, while other things just have to be my way. I'm so fortunate and thankful that my current manager realized and believed that I could 'do it.' I've consumed waaaaaaaay too much unhealthy food, and ironically, this has been the year I've been the least sick. I've seen new dimension within my family, that I need to take part in, regardless of what others think. I've been angry and don't know why. I can cry at the drop of a hat...depending on the day. I watch my boys...and smile. I watch my boys...and want to pull my hair out. I learn things about my wife and our marriage every day. I'm comfortable with my gray hair. I'm a slave to the automobile, and perceive that washing them makes them run better. I realize that my lawn will never be green enough. I realize that I am a good father for my boys and a good husband for my wife. I realize that I need to do more for my boys and my wife. I've made significant change in my role at work...and it was recognized by many. I've watched my website grow over the last 4 years and at the same time fail...hockey just ain't what it used to be. I've watched my love for hockey slowly fade. I've watched money cause so much happiness, and at the same time, so much pain with many. I've been to so many puppet shows and have seen the strings. I've realized that EVERYTHING will eventually get old and lose it's luster...no matter what it is. I finally understand that I have achieved major milestones in my life...and I realize that I have a long way to go. Within the last year, I've learned not to take everything on myself, and that there are others that want to help me succeed. It's not 'always' my fault. I'm kinda diggin the full beard. Why is everyone so far away from me? I realize that I've had close calls, and that I can't take the most important things in my life for granted. Can I honestly answer the question "Who am I?" Is it for me, or is it for someone else? If it isn't right for me, could it be right for someone else?

That's just tonight...you should see the really crazy nights! LOL!